This will be a short, mostly unedited update on my relationship with creativity so far this year.
Creativity has been fairly kind, we’ve gotten along, and she’s not been overly distant. I do think her rude and perceive brief absences as ghosting, but easily forgive and forget that hurt. Honestly, I have not been diligent in seeking daily output; that’s on me. There’s always the high hope Sunday night that I will start the week full throttle: journaling daily, dancing daily, finding inspiration for poetry and posts and Instagram captions as well as take care of my friends, my job, and remember to eat all my meals. Kidding! I never forget that last one! I wish I was making something beautiful every day, even something small. I am not and that makes me feel like I’m not living up to my creative potential. Sometimes I get hung up on the idea that this is a yearly theme and I only have this year to get all my creating in. There’s a tab on the blog for themes and if I don’t do enough, I can’t post enough. If I can’t post enough, I’ll fail my theme. That’s a lot of pressure, too much pressure and all self-imposed. I can’t read, journal, dance, paint, see a play, and post a blog every day. That’s the kind of creating I crave though.
This update will serve as a way to reset for the next few months; I will try to be gentle on my creative muscles and glad of the creating I do accomplish instead of bemoaning the creating I feel that I’ve missed out on. I will set out a plan here that readers can follow along with and hold me accountable to or do themselves and plan for their best creativity. Journaling will be my focus for a while. I want to write, and I need to practice that – end of story. That’s the muscle I want to flex most in this creative body. I’ll be posting personal writing challenges and some of my writing that’s not blog-related at all. That’s where the focus shall be. However, I do enjoy all the dancing, painting, reading, and movie-watching I do, so I’ll continue to do those things. But I’m going to take the pressure off. I can’t be the best writer and painter and dancer while also reading the most. All these other outlets will serve a means of creating when writing isn’t working. Using these activities to greater purpose by not putting pressure on those for a while, will help. They will be my escape. Right now, I get upset that I’m not as good as I want to be at painting, dancing, and photography. Those aren’t my outlet though; I don’t have to be good at those.
I had rough plans in my head for the year: to journal daily, read one creative book a month, go to a museum once a month, and create something new every weekend. I have dabbled with journaling; mostly just making lists. I have read two creative books so far: here and here. There’s been no museum trip as of yet and I’ve not created something each weekend. I have however, not been idle. I just needed some help. My best and I have been meeting at our local coffee shop on sporadic Saturdays. We’ve made lists, since that’s a great fall back of mine that I use as a ruse for creativity. We have also painted and made bracelets though. Recently, we had a random dance party with her silk fans. It was glorious. All this creating with my best friend in an environment that’s filled with support not pressure, is really what I need to take into my every day life. When we painted, we didn’t care that it wasn’t museum-worthy. When we made bracelets, we made them for our friends not for some graded project or arbitrary check list. We made them because they’re fun and we love our friends! That’s the kind of creating I want to hold onto going forward. Random dance parties and making something beautiful just for the sake of it. This is truly living creatively!
Stay tuned for writing updates! I think I’ll take a week of planning and list making and then post about challenges, my journal entries, or poetry on designated days.
*Email me, Instagram me, or comment on this post to join me in some yet to be determined writing challenges! Also, let me know if you have a challenge I can join.